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On being lazy...
fate
jenlyn_b
After I posted the novel meme a few entries ago, I got some questions about how I find time to write as much as I do. After much thought, I've (only somewhat facetiously) decided that the answer is that I'm fundamentally lazy, and this results in a net increase in my writing productivity. This may seem counterintuitive, but laziness can do a lot for you, so long as the things you're lazy about aren't related directly to whatever it is you want to accomplish.

For example, the other day, I was working at a local sandwich shop, and I realized that there was something wrong with my straw. Rather than inspect my straw (because that would take time and effort, and I am lazy), I continued to drink out of it and just periodically changed my drinking methods. At some point, it became clear that there was a hole in the straw about an inch from the top. At first, I just drank with my finger covering the hole, but then the hole got bigger. At this point, I *could* have gone up to the counter to get a new straw, but that probably would have taken at least a minute and a half, maybe even TWO minutes, and it would have required getting up (which I obviously was not going to do), so instead, I decided that the better course of action would just be to put the straw so far into my mouth that any liquid that escaped through the huge hole still ended up in my mouth. And I probably looked ridiculous, and yeah, it was a little uncomfortable, but you know, that's a minute and a half that I spent working instead of straw-fetching. Though in retrospect, it just now occurred to me that I could have taken the lid off my drink and not worried about the straw at all. The common sense, 'tis obviously not my strong point.

Another thing I'm really lazy about (which is going to sound really, profoundly strange)- going to the bathroom. In undergrad, when the bathroom was located way down the hallway, I'd always procrastinate about going until I really, really had to go, and then I'd sprint down the hallway full-speed. I bet I saved at least five minutes a day (if not more!) through sheer I-don't-want-to-walk-all-the-way-down-the-hallwayness alone.

Also, cooking. My roommate and I cook dinner together once a week, but besides that, I tend to be a "eat it only if it can be made in under three minutes" kind of girl. I'm also kind of scared of ovens, but that's totally beside the point.

Let's see... what else... 95% of the time, I'm WAY too lazy to be one of those girls who spends any amount of time on makeup. Lip gloss is doable, because I can apply it while walking if doing so strikes my fancy. I also choose to let my hair dry naturally and wear it curly instead of blow drying it straight (which is HOURS of saved time right there). On most days, it takes me approximately ten minutes to get ready in the morning, which means I get to sleep later than I otherwise would, and that means that I can stay up later at night, and that's when I get things done.

I've heard it said that you can also get extra time out of your day by cutting down on the amount of time spent on LOLcats, Go Fug Yourself, or the Blue Boards, but I vastly prefer my method of time-crunching. Even if I do sometimes end up drinking out of truly dysfunctional straws.

I love your mindset, your voice. . .in your blog! :)

I've often thought that laziness is the soul of ingenuity. (Why did early computer programmers invent software? To save them time! "I mean, really, there should be *some* way to automate this...")

Also, I realized after college that I loved dressing up as a perky Goth chick, but was not nearly vain enough to do the dressing and make-up required on a regular basis, and, as such, had to reserve it for Halloween and playing Vampire. But it was such a cute look on me!

LOL. You have excellent straw-hole problem solving abilities.

FYI on the straw thing, if the part with the hole is submersed, it works like its good as new. So if the hole is near the top, flip the straw over. :-)

Yes, you are dysfunctional, but in a familiar, comforting sort of way. Your twisted logic sounds a lot like the voice in my head.

This is Jennfier's older brother. For anyone who thinks shes is lazy, you should contact me...I have some snake oil you might be interested in.

Well, I'm Jennfier's roommate. And I can attest to the fact that shes is, in fact, one of the laziest people I've ever met.

I have never tried the bathroom trick but that intrigues me enough to give it a shot myself! More time saved is more reading time! I want to hear more about this oven fear though. hmmmmm......

Priscilla Sena

(Anonymous)

2008-05-14 09:50 pm (UTC)

Wow!
I love that part about the straw. That's really funny.

PS. Please continue to right THE SQUAD books. I love them. I'm going to try really hard to get my friends to buy them. One of them asked if they could just borrow my copies, and I was just like, no!

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